Talking About Death #6

I’ve been going through some of my old journals trying to combine all my writings that I want to keep up with and store them all in one place. I came across something that I wrote in December of 2000 and it triggered my thoughts. It was a year after my daddy died and at that point in time I was thinking a lot about death and how the death of a loved one affects those that are still living, those who are left to mourn/grieve that person. In my journal from that year I wrote several times about death because my daddy’s death had a very profound affect on me and my thoughts.

My journal entry from December 19, 2000 was about the terms that are used for death. We say the person has “passed away” and we say to the bereaved family “I’m sorry for your loss.”and I have never understood why we do that. It seems as though we avoid using the words death,died or dead. I think I partially believe it is because under the circumstances we just do not know exactly what to say to the bereaved but also because using those words gives permanency to the situation and death is a very difficult thing to accept.

After my daddy died I absolutely hated to hear people say, “I’m sorry for your loss.”maybe I am thinking about it far too literally but when something or someone is lost it/they can be looked for and possibly found, my daddy and all others who die are physically completely gone from this life, as much as all of us who grieve our loved ones who have left this life would like we cannot form a search party and go looking for them so they are definitely not lost. In the previously mentioned journal entry I wrote that I don’t understand why people use the term “passed away ” my thoughts about that have certainly changed. 2 Corinthians 5:5-10 speaks about being absent from the body and being present with the Lord. After thinking about it for the past few years I have formed the belief that once you have accomplished God’s purpose for your birth into this life, your death or end of this life occurs and you pass on to a place where you will have eternal life fulfilling whatever purposes God has for you there so I do believe that people pass away to another life.

My grandmother always says “just as sure as you’re born you’re going to die, we didn’t come here to stay.” I think that death should be something that we can have straightforward discussions about while remaining respectful to one another and not sugar coating the topic because it is an inevitable part of life.

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