I am always reminding myself that for as long as I can remember I have been taught that you are not supposed to question God, because he always knows and does best, but remembering that God is not to be questioned is an extremely difficult task for me when I have experiences in life that test my faith. In those situations I always find myself asking “why God?” even though I’ve been taught that God’s plan is always for the best.
This weekend I had a family member’s life end due to murder and it is an experience that for the last two days has really tested my faith in God, as much as I hate to admit it that’s my truth right now. I wasn’t very close with my cousin DeAngelo, but I did get to witness some of his journey from a boy into a young man. We had only recently began keeping in touch with one another. He was an educated young man who was seemingly trying to do all the right things in life; make something of himself and help his family, friends and others in the community where he grew up and tragically his life ended at twenty-four years old and I do not understand why God allows such things to happen. I am angry because my cousin’s life ended in this way and at the same time I am also angry with myself for questioning God.
James 1:2-4 NLT says “Dear brothers and sisters when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” I hope that maybe having constant experiences that test my faith and make me question God will eventually aid in making me a stronger person who learns to trust and have faith in God and accept his plan in every situation.💜