A Thankful Heart #27

There is always something for which to be thankful.” Charles Dickens

pro-church-media-441073-unsplashIt’s a week before Thanksgiving and for the last few days I have been trying to come up with something to write about because I love to write, but since I started this blog the words just don’t come to my mind as often as I would like them to.

I’m sitting in a quiet room alone at home because I need silence for the words to come and I started thinking about my life and the multitude of things that I have to be thankful for. A few weeks ago in perspective #25 I wrote about how I am always questioning my purpose and my place in this world, well in the last few weeks I have been thinking a lot about that and talking to God and praying he’ll soon show me his purpose for my life. I have decided to try and stay in the frame of mind thinking that as long as God allows me to wake up each morning, he has something more planned for my life, God has some purpose for me that I have not fulfilled yet. I am an imperfect human being so I have down days when I question life like when I wrote perspective #25 but I am so thankful for this life that I have been given and as I have stated before I want to be able to make a difference in the world even if it’s only through my writing.

I am thankful for God’s grace and mercy that carries us all through each day. I am thankful for my mother who has been with me through thick, thin and everything in between, she’s getting older,she’s almost to her promised seventy, and I can’t bare the thought of maybe having to live in a world without her some day. I am thankful for that one extraordinary aunt, my second mother y’all know who she is, God didn’t make anyone else like her, the tears come when I think about what she means to me. I am thankful for my brother who tests my patience as younger brothers do to their older sisters all the time, but he also shows me that he cares just at the right moment and he gave me the best nephew ever. My brother is also one of the smartest people I know and teaches me so much daily. I am thankful for my praying ninty three year old grandmother because she is ruler of our family and is aging better than a lot of people her age. I am thankful for my godfather because he has always been like a second father to me, he is a man I admire a lot. I am thankful for my adorable, handsome, super intelligent four year old nephew, because his smile, the way he calls my name and just everything about him makes this world a better place. I am thankful for my aunts and uncles, because they all show me what strength, intelligence, courage, love, and excellence is just by being who they are. I am thankful to have been taught the importance of family and to have family members that I know will always have my back.

I am extremely thankful for all the great people that God has placed all along the way throughout this journey called life because they have influenced the person that I am. I am thankful to have a roof over my head, sadly I realize there are so many people in this world who do not have a decent place to lay their head at night. I am thankful that my life does not lack love, I am fortunate to have people who I know without any doubts love me. As crazy as it probably sounds I am thankful for my physical struggles, because they have given me strength that sometimes even I don’t realize I possess until I have to use it. I am thankful that I have family in my life like my mother, who will tell me the truth about myself regardless of whether I want to hear it or not even if it hurts me. I am thankful to have had a father who was present in my life until God said it was time for him to go. I am thankful that God made me someone who has compassion for others. I am thankful for my sensitivity and all that makes me who I am. I could fill a million sheets of paper writing about the things I am thankful for and I would still need more paper. I think that the older I get the more I am realizing that even though I question life and my place in it, I am still trying to be a positive person with a thankful heart and truly appreciate all that I have been given.

This year on Thanksgiving as you sit around the table with your loved ones look around and think about your life and all that you have to be thankful for I know I will.💜

Forever In My Heart #16

F5FAC7DF-B599-4092-96DE-7BF907A90ECCToday it’s been 18 years since the light was dimmed in my world when God needed my daddy back in his eternal home, it is so hard to believe that it has been that long, because some days it feels like it was just a day or two ago. People always talk about how sons need their fathers which is very true but daughters need their father just as much. I think most teenagers at the age of 16 completely take life for granted and don’t ever forsee anything changing their way of life. Wednesday March 3,  1999 taught me to think differently about life and realize that you are truly not promised tomorrow.

My daddy died at a time in my life when I feel like I was just realizing how much I loved him, how grateful I was that he was my daddy and how much our daddy/daughter relationship mattered to me.

There has not been one day in the last 18 years that I haven’t thought about my daddy and wished that I could have him back in my world, healthy and happy. I miss so much about the man that my daddy was, things like his extremely optimistic view of life and his sense of humor that until this day is unparalleled to anyone else I know. The world could be falling down on my daddy but he always kept laughter in our lives, he had a way of joking about things that made you laugh and think about things in depth all at once.

I miss his intelligence, my daddy could make you feel like he knew something about everything. I miss being able to talk to him about everything that was on my mind anytime. I miss riding around town with him, when he was in real estate broker/appraiser mode, while never stepping out of daddy mode. I miss being his little girl who he carried on his shoulders all the time. I miss being a witness to the love that my daddy showed my mother, it was true love that surpassed and conquered all and it saddens me that everyone doesn’t get to grow up witnessing real love between their parents. I miss my daddy’s love for my brother and I, I think that he really enjoyed being our daddy. I miss his love and admiration for family. I often wish that Daddy was here to interact with his grandson who is so much like him, they would really be enjoying each other. I am sure my nephew would be taking rides on granddaddy’s knee every day.

I know we all speak of the good qualities that people possessed once they have transitioned from this life to the next and I am well aware that just as all humans my daddy wasn’t flawless but I don’t have a bad thing to say about him, God blessed me with a great daddy who I always knew loved me and that’s all that matters to me.💜

Dedicated to my daddy
Tee M. Taylor Sr.
12/12/47~3/3/99

Blessed To Know Love Personified #12

20180923_0146582763698612359055742.jpgI wonder if anyone reading this is like me when you think about the good people that God has placed in your life it brings tears to your eyes, because you think you are so undeserving of such good people in your life. I think the good people that God has placed in my life are a testament to how much love God has for me and that amazes me beyond words.

If you know me then you know that there are two people in my world who I am always writing and speaking about how grateful I am for them.  Those people are my mother and my Aunt Zel. It happens to be a day before my Aunt Zel’s birthday and I began to think about what I would  write in my usual birthday Facebook post or in a birthday card for her. I started thinking about what my Aunt Zel means to me and just the thought of all that she means to me brings tears to my eyes.  My Aunt Zel is one of the few people in my life whose love I never feel like I have to question, because love constantly pours from her. I very often wonder why God did not make more people like Zel, because if he had this world would surely be better. Zel is literally the kindest person I know,  Zel is always there for not only me but everyone she knows, whatever you ask of her it shall be done, you might have to remind her a time or two but she will do whatever you ask of her and it’s done with meticulous perfection.

I think of Zel as my second mother, that’s one of those thoughts about Zel that brings more than just a few tears to my eyes, because I 20180923_0120259139139210763471381.jpgrealize just how much God loves me, he not only gave me my mother, who I am infinitely grateful for but he placed Zel in my life, someone who has clothed me, fed me, taken me to doctor’s appointments, spent nights with me in the hospital, takes care of me and loves me just as my mother does. It amazes me how giving Zel is, there is not a selfish bone in her body, she is one of those type people who would probably give you the clothes off of her back just because you stated that you like what she is wearing. Zel is truly a Christ-like person. I can only remember a few times in my life that I have seen Zel angry, I believe that’s because she loves so intensely that it takes a lot for her to get to the boiling point of anger. Zel is someone who is deserving of only the best things in life, because she gives the best of herself on a daily basis. If you know her you should consider it a blessing because Zel is love personified. She is someone we should all aspire to be like.💜

The Unconditional Love of Children #11

7170CF6A-3F98-482F-8DE6-03BD8BD76BB2For the last three years I have been privileged and blessed to be able to watch my nephew grow into a remarkable, loving three year old miniature version of both his mother and father. Being around my nephew on a daily basis has made me realize how children his age truly give love from a pure place. I think small children have one condition that they place on giving love and that condition in my opinion is that they are treated well and feel loved. I think once we grow into adults we sometimes lose the ability to love without condition. As adults we begin to see flaws in one another that children are unaware of and we choose not to  accept those flaws which affects our ability to love unconditionally. I believe we all should learn from the small children around us, to unconditionally love the people in our lives who treat us well and are willing to accept us flaws and all.💜